By now you’ve learned that yesterday Apple, Inc launched their latest and greatest addition to their immensely successful product line. If you haven’t, you don’t use the internet, read much, or have very interesting acquaintances.

The iPad (Why not iBook or iTab?), is a 9.7″ touchscreen tablet device that allows users to play music, watch YouTube, browse the internet, read books, manage calendars and contacts, work with word processing, spreadsheet and presentation software, and also is readily available to download and run the +140,000 applications in Apple’s dominant mobile market share App Store.

It is, according to many reports, the final byproduct of over a decade of design, research, prototypes and the tears of Steve Jobs (Not! Steve Job doesn’t cry). And at a shockingly low Apple entry price point of $499, what’s not to love?

Well, lots actually.

• The Actual Physical Design – Essentially it is just an iPhone with enhanced graphics, processing, and touch real estate. Yes, it’s shiny. Yes, it’s lightweight. Yet, where was the innovation? No touch enabled sensors on front or back, a large outer black bezel, and why only the 9.7″ screen when rumors had it larger?
• No Multitasking – It is bad enough that iPhone OS software hasn’t allowed multiple applications to run simultaneously, but on a device that is supposed to destroy netbooks not being able to run AIM and Safari at the same time? That is ludicrous and a single dealbreaker, for me at least, in the purchase decision.
• No Camera – I really have no clue what Apple was thinking here. Even the software on the thing indicates there should be a camera. This is meant to be a casual mobile device for consumers. Casual indicates light browsing and media functionality in my opinion. So much of light browsing on today’s internet is user-generated. Facebook, Twitter, Flickr, DailyBooth, etc. No camera = Lack of content generation. No iChat, no Skype. Apple missed a big opportunity for easy video-conferencing with this new device.
• No Flash – I’m still bothered that I don’t have Flash support on my iPhone, but I can live with it since I know it is only a phone. Not having flash on the iPad, an almost solely dedicated internet device, is outstandingly stupid but typical Apple. There is no secret that Cupertino’s 1 Infinite Loop isn’t fond of flash, but they’re ignoring a popular segment of the interwebs. You want to watch streaming video do ya? Not on the iPad!
• Adapters Suck – I think Apple made a big mistake in limiting the iPad’s native functionality. There is a touchscreen keyboard (I’m pessimistic but will save judgment until I try it), but they go and offer a full keyboard adapter. There is no SD slot for easy image sharing, but there is an adapter. There is no USB, so you need an adapter. These should have all been built-in without question. Adapters are something you’d expect from Sony or Dell, not Apple.
• The iPad Name – It just sucks. Forget the obvious jokes in reference to female hygiene, the iPad name doesn’t do enough to really identify the product. It sounds too much like iPod (Think Boston “iPaawwdd”) and fails to leave a resonating mark in terms of use. Since the inherent iBooks app is so prevalent, why not iBook? Or since the MacBook line was scrapped and made entirely MacBook Pros, why not MacBook? Or even to differentiate the line further, why not iTab?
• Not Widescreen! – It is 2010, I’m confident consumers don’t want to return to a 4:3 aspect ratio from the standard widescreen 16:9. These omissions are almost laughable at this point.
• No HDMI Out – Want to watch the 1080p movie you just downloaded from iTunes on your big screen? Sorry, no HD out component. Unbelievable.
• AT&T. Again. – While WiFi support is built-in, 3G coverage is only available from AT&T again. Apple customers are further locked into a single telecom. Although there should be points for the $30 per month unlimited terms without a contract (You pay month-to-month as you wish). Although the optional $15 plan per month for 256MB is a blatant insult to every consumer.

Don’t get me completely wrong, this idea (just not this device), is groundbreaking. Apple is trying to bridge the gap from notebook computers to mobile phones. It’s revolutionary and has promise. Unfortunately, most people won’t need it right now. If you have a laptop and a smart phone, this device is simply unnecessary.

The only conceivable way I’d buy this, as is anyway, is if I only had a desktop computer and a phone without a data plan. Then this component could find a place in my digital lifestyle.

The original iPhone had flaws as well, and has gone on to become an amazing product and the nation’s most popular data mobile phone. This iPad has severe limitations now, but count on Apple to rectify these initial problems as new versions roll out in their carefully constructed product launches in years to come. We’re increasing mobile and lead increasingly time specific lives. Static computer use is eroding. Apple is aware. In five years, everyone might have an iPad to call their own. Just not this version.

Dear Mr. Cowher,

Hello sir. My name is Dan. You do not know me but your reputation precedes you. I am a Buffalo Bills fan(atic). When we finally let Dick Jauron go this season, my number one choice of potential next coach for my beloved Bills was, you guessed it, yourself. Also on my short list were Jon Gruden, followed by Mike Shanahan. Yet you stood far and away the dream candidate. The perfect pipedream option.

As a Bills fan, I have come to expect questionable-at-best football operations. Take for example drafting Aaron Maybin over Brian Orapko and Brian Cushing, as I screamed obscenities at Mel Kiper’s meticulously groomed hair, but I digress. With the expectation of poor management, I was sure Buffalo would target mid-level coaching prospects. No disrespect to the likes of Jim Haslett, Brian Billick, or Jim Fassel – I was just sure we wouldn’t spend the money to target a professional of your caliber. Especially since we seem to target coaches who are largely irrelevant, since our franchise has been just that, largely irrelevant.

Then came the reports that Buffalo reached out to Mike Shanahan, Jon Gruden, and yourself. Shanahan was the lone candidate to agree to a meeting (But was simply leveraging himself for an extra 0 or two from Mr. Snyder’s checkbook), Gruden declined the outreach (and re-signed with the worldwide leader), and you simply refused to consider coaching options until the end of the season. I was sure you were blowing us off like everyone else. Hell it is not just me, even the local media practices the continual self-loathing that Bills on-field results have inevitably ingrained in our sports DNA.

Then there were reports of a stealth meeting between the Bills and yourself.  The collective hopes of a franchise in limbo were briefly ignited again. After all, this is a fanbase that only had 1000 tickets available to watch a meaningless game in January – in a brutal blizzard – for a 5-10 team – amidst a decade long playoff drought – with an interim coach – against Curtis Painter – in the league’s 3rd largest capacity stadium. Dedication exemplified.

No better fans in football.

There is no mistaking it, we want you to come to Buffalo. Hell, we have a billboard going up urging our owner to think along our thoughts. At your roots, you can’t be Jerry Jones’ whipping boy. You’re old school. A blue collar guy from near Pittsburgh that earned every success in your life. Your hard work ethic and commitment to loyalty mirrors our values.

I’m sure Leslie Frazier deserves to be a Head Coach in this league. Perry Fewell (Very Cool) will be a Head Coach in the NFL. Brian Billick carries serious merits and will return to coaching sooner or later. Jim Harbaugh won’t be at Stanford long. Ron Rivera has always been highly regarded. There are dozens of legitimate and worthy candidates for this position. But there is only one perfect fit: Bill Cowher.

This franchise is treading in three foot quicksand. Not sunk, just stuck. Our next Head Coach needs immediate credibility. We need someone who can fire up his players, fire up the rabid Ralph fans, and coach the game of football the way it was meant to be played, with toughness.

By all accounts the offer is on the table to make you the highest paid coach/executive in the league. I’m sure it is not about the money, but Mr. Wilson is showing a commitment to enable your visions as he desperately seeks a title at his young-at-heart age of 91.

I understand there are newer and better stadiums to base yourself. I understand New York’s tax structure is brutal. I understand our team’s talent is subpar at nearly every position. I understand the apprehension of returning to a 24/7 stressful job with a family. I understand every conceivable reason for not coming to Buffalo. But one thing I will not understand is the notion that there will be “better” jobs out there eventually.

Mr. Cowher, you’re a football coach to your core. It is your calling. A professional in every sense of the word. There is nowhere else in this league where you will be as supported like Buffalo will support you. You can choose to come to Buffalo and immediately become an iconic figure. This is a real place to cement your legacy as one of the game’s greatest football minds. A place where you can give the fanbase hope and inspiration for a title we so rightfully deserve. You can leverage us against another team, go back to yucking it up with Shannon Sharpe predicting whether or not the Raiders will run more than 22 times, or you can be a Head Coach in the NFL of a proud franchise that is a perfect fit for your coaching and personal style.

This does not have to be a pipedream. We want you Bill. No, we need you Mr. Cowher.

The question is: do you want us?

With hopes,

Dan Driffill

Final Season Awards

MVP – Peyton Manning

In a season where no one threatened any league records but still put in worthy appearances, no one stood out brighter than Mr. Peyton Manning. Most Valuable should be reflected in the votes, who is more valuable than the greatest quarterback to ever toss the pigskin? Is Indianapolis an 8-8 team without Manning? He should tie Brett Favre as the only player to win the award three times.

Coach – Jim Caldwell

For the second year straight, a first year head coach wins the award. Despite Caldwell pulling his starters last week against the Jets, effectively ending the chance at a perfect regular season record. Yet if you ask the Patriots, it isn’t about 16-0, it’s about the Lombardi Trophy. Caldwell has the Colts poised as the team to beat going into the postseason.

Rookie – Percy Harvin

Despite sagging statistics late and noble efforts from Austin Collie, Beanie Wells, and Jeremy Maclin Harvin is my pick for top-impact first year player. Defensive Rookie will be Brian Cushing hands down. Kid was all over the place this year.

Last week: 6 – 8 – 2

Season total: 117 – 117 – 6

Sports Meister: 124 – 113 – 3

Sports Guy: 123 – 111 – 5

I suppose over the course of 17 weeks the math missed a game or two. Oh well, let’s work on the assumption that Simmons’ count is the accurate one. After all, he’s the only one getting paid for this picking embarassment.

Colts (+8) over Bills

Apparently Vegas thinks Buffalo will play strong in their season finale at home against the Colts’ backups, unfortunately I know the real Buffalo Bills. An 8-point cover from Ryan Fitzpatrick would literally shock me. Please, for the love of all that is good in this world, football Gods; BRING US BILL COWHER!!

Jaguars (+1) over Browns

Because Cleveland really sucks. Point of note, why can Cleveland get their man (Holmgren) in weeks but the Bills are spurned by every notable name despite a seemingless blank check being thrown at them? Life as a Bills fan.

Bears (-3) over Lions

Jay Cutler is uniquely talented to play the position of quarterback in this league. If, sorry when, he gets the weapons and protection he needs, Chicago will have nothing to worry about.

49ers (-9) over Rams

Despite their great start, San Francisco and Coach Singletary couldn’t overcome their lack of talent. But finally there is football hope in the Bay area once again.

Steelers (-3) over Dolphins

Pittsburgh needs a win. Enough said.

Vikings (-8) over Giants

Minnesota needs a bounce-back game and after New York’s effort at their home finale last week versus Carolina, I can’t think of a better team for Favre and Co to jump on moving into the playoffs.

Falcons (+2) over Bucs

Tampa beat the Saints, I officially can’t refer to them as the “Yucks” anymore. Congrats to Raheem Morris, you should definitely retain your role next year. Especially given the rumored interest your ownership has in Bill Cowher.

Panthers (-7) over Saints

New Orleans with no Drew Brees is like wearing mismatched socks. It may be acceptable but you know something is not right.

Patriots (+7) over Texans

Brady and Bill with 7 at the end of the year? Hard to root against.

Eagles (-3) over Cowboys

I’ve been dogging Dallas and praising Philly all season – have to stick to my guns at this point.

Broncos (-10) over Chiefs

Josh McDaniels and the Denver brigade need a win. The Chefs are a nice target.

Ravens (-11) over Raiders

Harbaugh and the Baltimore brigade need a win. The Raiders are a nice target.

Packers (+3) over Cardinals

Aaron Rodgers probably deserved MVP consideration. Go Pack Go!

Chargers (-4) over Redskins

The Jim Zorn era was interesting to say the least. Don’t worry DC fans, Mike Shanahan is waiting in the wings.

Titans (-6) over Seahawks

Chris Johnson over Adrian Peterson in next year’s fantasy draft? Let the debate begin.

Jets (-10) over Bengals

Rex Ryan need a win. The Bengals are likely to sit most of their players in this one.

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